1
00:00:08,801 --> 00:00:09,802
Why are you up?

2
00:00:09,969 --> 00:00:11,596
How am I supposed to sleep?

3
00:00:11,762 --> 00:00:14,807
I've been married less than 24 hours
and my wife isn't speaking to me.

4
00:00:16,851 --> 00:00:19,562
Perhaps you could think of this
in a more positive light.

5
00:00:19,937 --> 00:00:21,939
In one day, you've managed to do

6
00:00:22,106 --> 00:00:24,275
what it takes many couples
decades to achieve.

7
00:00:28,154 --> 00:00:29,530
- Hi.
- Hey.

8
00:00:29,697 --> 00:00:30,948
You couldn't sleep either?

9
00:00:31,991 --> 00:00:33,075
Of course not.

10
00:00:33,409 --> 00:00:36,287
Me neither.
But I just had a tickle in my throat.

11
00:00:37,788 --> 00:00:39,457
Not profound marital problems.

12
00:00:41,292 --> 00:00:43,294
- What are we gonna do?
- I don't know.

13
00:00:43,461 --> 00:00:45,463
Please tell me how I can fix it.

14
00:00:45,630 --> 00:00:46,797
I'm glad you asked.

15
00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:51,052
As I see it, there's a simple solution.

16
00:00:51,260 --> 00:00:54,222
Your lips had a dalliance
with the lips of another woman.

17
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:58,017
It seems only logical that
to restore balance to the relationship,

18
00:00:58,184 --> 00:01:01,270
you should find another man
and daily with him.

19
00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:04,690
And by daily, I mean some hardcore
mouth-on-mouth action.

20
00:01:05,149 --> 00:01:07,860
Okay, that is the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.

21
00:01:08,027 --> 00:01:10,154
I actually think he's onto something.

22
00:01:10,321 --> 00:01:12,365
What? You can't be serious.

23
00:01:12,531 --> 00:01:14,617
Just 'cause I messed up
and made out with a girl,

24
00:01:14,784 --> 00:01:17,411
you're gonna do the same
with a random guy?

25
00:01:17,954 --> 00:01:19,288
I'm currently single.

26
00:01:21,832 --> 00:01:23,292
That's true. You are.

27
00:01:25,503 --> 00:01:26,837
What is happening?

28
00:01:29,006 --> 00:01:30,716
I will tell you what is happening.

29
00:01:30,883 --> 00:01:32,843
I am saving my best friend's marriage.

30
00:02:12,216 --> 00:02:16,262
Sheldon, I don't think you understand
how being broken up works.

31
00:02:16,429 --> 00:02:18,306
The only way I can sort
through my feelings

32
00:02:18,472 --> 00:02:20,141
is if there is space between us.

33
00:02:20,308 --> 00:02:23,060
Every time I see you,
it re-traumatizes me.

34
00:02:23,227 --> 00:02:25,062
I go through the pain all over again.

35
00:02:25,479 --> 00:02:27,064
Well, hello to you, too.

36
00:02:28,858 --> 00:02:29,942
What do you want?

37
00:02:30,109 --> 00:02:31,986
I understand we're no longer a couple,

38
00:02:32,153 --> 00:02:35,573
but I would like to remind you
that we made a baby together.

39
00:02:38,284 --> 00:02:39,493
What baby?

40
00:02:41,078 --> 00:02:44,332
A precocious little Internet show
known as fun with flags.

41
00:02:46,417 --> 00:02:47,460
I'm hanging up.

42
00:02:47,626 --> 00:02:49,306
Yeah, great.
See you in about half an hour.

43
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:53,424
Sheldon, I am not doing
fun with flags with you.

44
00:02:53,591 --> 00:02:56,594
- Why not?
- Because we're broken up.

45
00:02:56,761 --> 00:02:58,512
Sonny and Cher made it work.

46
00:02:58,929 --> 00:03:01,223
Their variety show kept going
long after the divorce,

47
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,225
and here we are still talking about them.

48
00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:06,937
No one's talking about Sonny and Cher.

49
00:03:07,980 --> 00:03:09,416
You must be thinking
about Donny and Marie,

50
00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:11,942
'cause you and I are clearly
talking about Sonny and Cher.

51
00:03:13,444 --> 00:03:15,279
Sheldon, this has to stop.

52
00:03:15,613 --> 00:03:18,616
I know it's hard. It's hard for me, too.

53
00:03:18,783 --> 00:03:21,952
But I've seen and talked to you more
in the two days we've been broken up

54
00:03:22,119 --> 00:03:24,622
than in the last two months
that we were together.

55
00:03:24,789 --> 00:03:27,625
Well, if you wanna see less of me,
maybe we should go out again.

56
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,463
Can't believe you made out
with Mandy chow.

57
00:03:32,630 --> 00:03:34,423
Oh, trust me, I wish it never happened.

58
00:03:35,007 --> 00:03:36,842
And you knew about this this whole time?

59
00:03:37,009 --> 00:03:40,054
- I did.
- And you didn't think to tell me?

60
00:03:42,139 --> 00:03:43,659
Leonard asked me to keep it to myself.

61
00:03:43,808 --> 00:03:46,102
Let's leave Leonard out of this
for the moment.

62
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:50,189
This is about you and me.

63
00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:55,319
How is my day-old marriage falling apart
becoming about you two?

64
00:03:55,486 --> 00:03:58,906
Hang on. What do I need to do
to make you trust me?

65
00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:02,197
You think it's hard having one wife,
try having two.

66
00:04:03,536 --> 00:04:04,936
You know, I bet you told Bernadette

67
00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:07,873
all about how he was screwing around
with Mandy chow.

68
00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,668
We didn't screw around.
We just got drunk and made out.

69
00:04:10,835 --> 00:04:13,337
Whatever. It would've been nice
to hear it from you.

70
00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:29,437
What are you doing here?

71
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:34,024
I am here to return your belongings.
That's what people who've broken up do.

72
00:04:34,859 --> 00:04:38,696
And you didn't do your compulsive
knocking ritual so I would open the door.

73
00:04:38,863 --> 00:04:43,242
On the contrary, you no longer get
to enjoy my charming eccentricities.

74
00:04:44,994 --> 00:04:46,704
We're not friends with benefits.

75
00:04:49,165 --> 00:04:50,916
- Just give me the box.
- Yeah, wait, wait.

76
00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:54,211
Don't you wanna go through it
to make sure I haven't forgotten anything?

77
00:04:54,712 --> 00:04:55,713
Fine.

78
00:04:58,090 --> 00:04:59,216
My old scarf.

79
00:04:59,383 --> 00:05:01,664
Yeah. You wore it the night
we went ice skating. Remember?

80
00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,607
You mean the night that I went ice skating

81
00:05:03,721 --> 00:05:07,057
and you stood at the rail
gooinng the symptoms of hypothermia.

82
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,562
We made one heck of a team, huh?

83
00:05:14,857 --> 00:05:16,525
Whose bra is this?

84
00:05:18,402 --> 00:05:19,737
It's not yours?

85
00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:22,281
Oh, my!

86
00:05:23,282 --> 00:05:25,117
Well, how embarrassing for both of us.

87
00:05:27,703 --> 00:05:30,206
- It's penny's.
- Hey, you broke up with me.

88
00:05:30,372 --> 00:05:32,132
It is none of your business
whose naked bosom

89
00:05:32,291 --> 00:05:33,918
I'm smooshing around like pizza dough.

90
00:05:35,503 --> 00:05:36,629
Goodbye.

91
00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:43,260
Amy. Amy. Amy.

92
00:05:46,764 --> 00:05:48,724
Tables work, too. Good to know.

93
00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:55,272
Ooh, brownies for girls' night.

94
00:05:55,439 --> 00:05:57,024
Hands off, I'm mad at you.

95
00:05:57,775 --> 00:05:59,276
Look, I know it's a lot of money,

96
00:05:59,443 --> 00:06:04,156
but the guy at the store said in
five to seven years, it'll pay for itself.

97
00:06:04,823 --> 00:06:06,325
What will pay for itself?

98
00:06:12,122 --> 00:06:14,124
Doesn't matter. What are you mad about?

99
00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:18,641
I'm mad at you for blabbing to me
what Leonard did on the north sea

100
00:06:18,796 --> 00:06:21,316
and I'm mad that I've had to hide this
from penny for two years.

101
00:06:21,465 --> 00:06:25,135
And you have every right
to be mad about those things. So...

102
00:06:25,636 --> 00:06:28,806
Why don't you let me handle
the credit card bill this month, huh?

103
00:06:28,973 --> 00:06:30,808
I mean, don't even look at it.

104
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:35,354
I mean, if penny finds out I've known
all this time and haven't told her,

105
00:06:35,521 --> 00:06:37,398
she's gonna think I'm a terrible friend.

106
00:06:37,565 --> 00:06:38,941
I wish you never told me.

107
00:06:39,108 --> 00:06:43,320
And I wish Leonard never told me.
He's the bad guy here!

108
00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:46,615
I guess that's true.

109
00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:50,077
And you let penny marry him.

110
00:06:51,829 --> 00:06:52,997
Compared to that, who cares

111
00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:56,333
if I bought a George Clooney
limited edition manscaping kit?

112
00:07:01,463 --> 00:07:03,924
Hi, I'm calling about
your marriage counseling services

113
00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:06,010
and was curious what your rate is.

114
00:07:08,804 --> 00:07:10,014
Really?

115
00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:15,603
Um, okay, is there any kind of discount
for length of marriage?

116
00:07:18,230 --> 00:07:19,857
We're just talking hours here.

117
00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,737
- Hi.
- Call you back.

118
00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:25,946
Hey.

119
00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:27,364
Can we talk?

120
00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:28,741
I would love that.

121
00:07:33,078 --> 00:07:34,079
All right.

122
00:07:34,246 --> 00:07:37,207
Look, I'm sorry I said I was okay
with everything before we got married.

123
00:07:37,374 --> 00:07:40,502
I hate that we're going through this,
but I don't know what to do.

124
00:07:41,003 --> 00:07:44,882
If you don't mind waiting for a groupon,
we can try marriage counseling.

125
00:07:46,592 --> 00:07:49,887
- Hello.
- Hey, buddy, can we have some privacy?

126
00:07:50,054 --> 00:07:52,431
Oh, of course. Wouldn't want to intrude.

127
00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:54,933
_so__ -this is yours.

128
00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:04,735
Okay. When I'm done with him,
I'm gonna need more information.

129
00:08:04,902 --> 00:08:08,906
Yeah. It's nothing odd.
I just wanted to rub Amy's nose in it.

130
00:08:11,116 --> 00:08:12,951
Okay, look, I might be overreacting,

131
00:08:13,118 --> 00:08:15,221
but how am I supposed
to get past this when I know tomorrow

132
00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:16,997
you're gonna go to work
and see this woman?

133
00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:20,125
Now, forgive me for eavesdropping,

134
00:08:20,292 --> 00:08:22,753
but as I see it,
there's a simple solution.

135
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,464
Wake up, wake up, wake up!

136
00:08:29,176 --> 00:08:31,345
Bring penny to meet Mandy.

137
00:08:31,512 --> 00:08:32,763
What? Why?

138
00:08:32,930 --> 00:08:36,016
Well, right now
penny's imagination's running wild,

139
00:08:36,183 --> 00:08:40,479
but if they meet, that will eliminate
the mystery and alleviate her fears.

140
00:08:40,646 --> 00:08:44,274
Like when that sparkletts guy
let me look under his eye patch.

141
00:08:47,319 --> 00:08:49,488
First of all, you made that guy cry.

142
00:08:50,781 --> 00:08:53,617
And we learned that you don't need
an eyeball to do that.

143
00:08:56,787 --> 00:09:00,999
Secondly, I can't think of a more horrible
idea than penny meeting Mandy.

144
00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:03,043
Really? Why is that?

145
00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:04,479
What? You actually wanna meet her?

146
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:06,815
No, but now that you're being weird
about it, maybe I should.

147
00:09:06,839 --> 00:09:08,799
Well, I'm not being weird.
Am I being weird?

148
00:09:08,966 --> 00:09:09,967
Yes.

149
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,137
And that's coming from me.

150
00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:16,473
Fine, you wanna meet her?

151
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:19,411
No, I just wanna know that when you're
at work, there's nothing going on.

152
00:09:19,435 --> 00:09:22,646
How many times do I have to tell you?
I have no interest in this woman.

153
00:09:22,813 --> 00:09:24,457
Yeah, well, maybe she has interest in you.

154
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:28,152
What, in Leonard? Even the sparkletts guy
could see that's unlikely.

155
00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:37,953
I guess my big problem is
I never saw Leonard as the kind of guy

156
00:09:38,162 --> 00:09:39,997
who would do something like this.

157
00:09:40,706 --> 00:09:43,333
Anybody can make a mistake
in a weak moment.

158
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,210
What do you think?

159
00:09:46,462 --> 00:09:48,338
I... I don't know what to think.

160
00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:50,382
But then again, I just found out about it.

161
00:09:53,969 --> 00:09:55,196
You know, I fell in love with Leonard

162
00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:57,660
because he wasn't anything like
the guys I was used to dating.

163
00:09:57,806 --> 00:09:59,726
I mean, I knew those guys
weren't above cheating,

164
00:09:59,850 --> 00:10:01,351
because that's usually how we met.

165
00:10:03,020 --> 00:10:05,230
Come on, you know Leonard's not like that.

166
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:07,566
No, I wanna believe you. I really do.

167
00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:09,902
Am I being naive?

168
00:10:10,861 --> 00:10:12,112
I don't know.

169
00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:14,865
This is all so new to me.
I'm still processing.

170
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:20,537
You know, he never would've done this
when we first met. He's cockier now.

171
00:10:20,704 --> 00:10:22,748
That's because you made him
more confident.

172
00:10:23,499 --> 00:10:25,259
You know, if you think about it,
without you,

173
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:27,628
he never would've grown
into the person he is now.

174
00:10:28,170 --> 00:10:30,047
I mean, sure, more women might notice him,

175
00:10:30,214 --> 00:10:33,300
but I think it's better to have a guy
be with you because he wants to be,

176
00:10:33,467 --> 00:10:36,136
and not because he thinks
he doesn't have any other choice.

177
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:38,514
Never thought about it like that.

178
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:40,390
Me neither. Not until just now.

179
00:10:44,228 --> 00:10:47,022
Hello, I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper,
and welcome to:

180
00:10:49,942 --> 00:10:52,277
You may notice
that I'm holding a remote control.

181
00:10:52,444 --> 00:10:55,739
That's because my cameraperson
and co-host, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler,

182
00:10:55,906 --> 00:10:58,450
has chosen to end
her relationship with me.

183
00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,914
I'm going to pause here
to let that sink in.

184
00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:12,631
Okay.

185
00:11:12,798 --> 00:11:15,509
If you need to pause a little longer,
just click the pause button.

186
00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:19,012
But the show must go on.

187
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,460
And thankfully, all of the things
my girlfriend used to do

188
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,559
can be taken care of with my right hand.

189
00:11:31,275 --> 00:11:34,111
Anyway, let's not spend any more time
talking about her.

190
00:11:34,278 --> 00:11:35,737
We're here to talk about flags.

191
00:11:35,946 --> 00:11:38,949
Tonight's theme: Flags of countries
that have been torn apart

192
00:11:39,116 --> 00:11:41,451
and the women I have a feeling
were responsible.

193
00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:48,125
You guys have any idea how much it costs
to see a marriage counselor?

194
00:11:48,292 --> 00:11:49,751
$250 an hour. Why?

195
00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:52,170
How do you know?

196
00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:54,548
Bernadette and I have occasionally
gone to one to,

197
00:11:54,715 --> 00:11:56,466
you know, stay on top of things.

198
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:58,468
And I'm just hearing about this now?

199
00:12:00,137 --> 00:12:01,680
Dude, just because we're best friends

200
00:12:01,847 --> 00:12:04,474
doesn't mean that I have to tell you
everything that goes on.

201
00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:06,643
You don't have to, you should want to.

202
00:12:08,562 --> 00:12:10,564
Oh, great. There's Mandy.

203
00:12:12,983 --> 00:12:14,985
Why are marine biologists always so cute?

204
00:12:15,319 --> 00:12:16,486
I don't know.

205
00:12:17,154 --> 00:12:19,406
But I'd like to get lost
in her Bermuda triangle.

206
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,326
It's not helpful.

207
00:12:23,327 --> 00:12:26,496
Then I won't say I'd like to cover
three-quarters of her surface area.

208
00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:30,208
- Are we done?
- Not yet, this is fun.

209
00:12:30,709 --> 00:12:33,337
Ooh, I know. I'd let her free my Willy.

210
00:12:34,504 --> 00:12:35,672
Where are you going?

211
00:12:35,881 --> 00:12:37,984
I'm gonna ask her
if she'd be willing to talk to penny

212
00:12:38,008 --> 00:12:39,402
and tell her she has nothing
to worry about.

213
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:41,011
- No, Leonard, wait.
- What?

214
00:12:41,178 --> 00:12:43,096
I'd like to spongebob her squarepants.

215
00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:46,516
Now we are done.

216
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,729
- Hey.
- Hi, Leonard. What's up?

217
00:12:50,896 --> 00:12:52,606
Do you mind if I sit?

218
00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:53,857
Sure.

219
00:12:54,232 --> 00:12:59,029
So, um, I've been thinking a lot
about you and me and... the boat.

220
00:12:59,196 --> 00:13:01,198
- What about it?
- You know,

221
00:13:01,365 --> 00:13:03,200
what we did when we were drunk.

222
00:13:03,367 --> 00:13:05,702
Oh, no! Did I sleep with you, too?

223
00:13:07,871 --> 00:13:09,081
Nope, we just made out.

224
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:10,999
Oh! Well, good for me.

225
00:13:12,751 --> 00:13:14,211
So, what can I do for you?

226
00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:17,506
Uh, okay, well, I got married recently.

227
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:19,049
Oh, congratulations!

228
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:20,342
To Sheldon?

229
00:13:22,928 --> 00:13:24,096
Never gets old.

230
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:26,306
No, no, to a girl.

231
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:29,351
Anyway, I told her what happened
between you and me

232
00:13:29,518 --> 00:13:32,229
and she's concerned about us
seeing each other at work.

233
00:13:32,396 --> 00:13:34,731
It was just a kiss.
Why would you even tell her?

234
00:13:34,898 --> 00:13:37,567
'Cause I didn't want there
to be any secrets between us.

235
00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:39,111
Is that really the reason?

236
00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:41,279
What else would it be?

237
00:13:41,738 --> 00:13:44,425
I don't know. Sounds like you're trying
to sabotage the relationship.

238
00:13:44,449 --> 00:13:45,951
No, I don't think so.

239
00:13:46,827 --> 00:13:49,913
Although, penny did say exactly that.

240
00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:52,374
Okay. Well, that's something
to think about.

241
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,335
You know, on some level,
I've always believed

242
00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:57,713
that I don't deserve a woman like her.

243
00:13:58,588 --> 00:14:00,424
Oh, you're gonna think
about that right here?

244
00:14:03,385 --> 00:14:06,847
I mean, she's really beautiful.
She can have any guy she wants.

245
00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:11,184
Which is probably why it took her
so many years to tell me she loved me.

246
00:14:11,643 --> 00:14:13,523
Maybe you should talk
to a therapist about this.

247
00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:14,730
Too expensive.

248
00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:21,236
You'd think I'd be used
to women withholding their love.

249
00:14:21,403 --> 00:14:23,684
I mean, my mother did.
I mean, no matter how hard I tried,

250
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:25,949
she just didn't have any interest in me.

251
00:14:26,116 --> 00:14:27,242
Imagine that.

252
00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:32,581
I wonder if that's why I have such
a dysfunctional relationship with Sheldon.

253
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:36,960
I had a dream the other night
that I was in a cave

254
00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:39,588
and I was nursing a baby.

255
00:14:39,963 --> 00:14:42,966
But the baby had Sheldon's head on it.

256
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:48,263
And your wife is worried about me?

257
00:14:49,848 --> 00:14:50,891
Raj: Hey, Leonard!

258
00:14:51,308 --> 00:14:53,685
When you're done,
we came up with a bunch more.

259
00:14:58,148 --> 00:15:00,150
And then the Czech Republic says
to Slovakia,

260
00:15:00,317 --> 00:15:03,028
"I don't think you understand
how being broken up works!"

261
00:15:04,780 --> 00:15:05,781
Can you believe that?

262
00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:08,468
You'd think that the Czech Republic
would try to hold on to what it had

263
00:15:08,492 --> 00:15:10,292
given that it's not
as young as it used to be.

264
00:15:10,786 --> 00:15:13,830
And I don't see any other countries
lining up to invade its southern borders.

265
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,000
I'm gonna kill him.

266
00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:20,212
But enough about the Czech Republic.

267
00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:23,673
Let's talk about the time Moldova made
Romania a birthday cake.

268
00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:26,551
And Romania said it tasted good
even though it didn't.

269
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:28,678
And yet, Romania gets dumped.

270
00:15:28,887 --> 00:15:31,014
I'll pause here
while you mull that one over.

271
00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:35,143
I know, right?

272
00:15:39,856 --> 00:15:42,025
So? You said you had something to tell me.

273
00:15:42,192 --> 00:15:43,860
Okay. Yeah. Um,

274
00:15:44,027 --> 00:15:47,114
do you remember when you accused me
of trying to sabotage our wedding?

275
00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:48,490
Uh-huh.

276
00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:51,993
I've been thinking about it
and you might be right.

277
00:15:52,619 --> 00:15:57,582
But... the good news is
that I'm pretty sure I know why.

278
00:15:58,416 --> 00:15:59,417
I'm listening.

279
00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:04,339
Penny, after all these years, I still
feel like maybe I don't deserve you.

280
00:16:06,216 --> 00:16:09,344
Okay, that is the lamest excuse
you could've possibly come up with.

281
00:16:11,596 --> 00:16:12,889
But I get it.

282
00:16:13,098 --> 00:16:14,099
You do?

283
00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:16,768
Yeah. You know, sometimes I worry
you're gonna wake up

284
00:16:16,935 --> 00:16:19,062
and leave me for someone more like you.

285
00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:23,316
I don't even understand
why you're with someone like me.

286
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:25,360
Why would I wanna be with someone like me?

287
00:16:26,444 --> 00:16:27,696
You know what I mean.

288
00:16:28,738 --> 00:16:33,326
And, you know, maybe the way I've been
reacting was me sabotaging this, too.

289
00:16:34,411 --> 00:16:38,665
Well, how about we stop
being so scared

290
00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:41,168
of losing each other and just be together?

291
00:16:42,544 --> 00:16:45,255
- That sounds nice.
- Good.

292
00:16:45,422 --> 00:16:46,423
Mmm.

293
00:16:46,756 --> 00:16:48,008
'Cause

294
00:16:48,175 --> 00:16:50,552
I've loved you since the moment we met,

295
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,138
and I will keep loving you
until the end of time.

296
00:16:55,140 --> 00:16:58,351
Oh, my god, that is the most beautiful
thing anyone's ever said to me.

297
00:16:58,518 --> 00:16:59,644
Yeah?

298
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:02,147
That's because you're beautiful,

299
00:17:02,397 --> 00:17:06,693
and your beauty fills my heart
with love and song.

300
00:17:09,112 --> 00:17:11,907
It's getting kind of cheesy, Leonard.

301
00:17:12,449 --> 00:17:15,118
If you think that's cheesy, buckle up.

302
00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:21,166
Penny hofstadter,
will you please stay married to me?

303
00:17:22,626 --> 00:17:24,169
Oh, damn it, you topped it.

304
00:17:27,839 --> 00:17:30,159
Shall we go to the bedroom
and make this marriage official?

305
00:17:30,217 --> 00:17:31,468
- Yes, please.
- Okay.

306
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:41,019
Sheldon, I can't believe
you got us a wedding gift.

307
00:17:41,186 --> 00:17:44,981
I don't know why you're so surprised.
I watch movies. I see what people do.

308
00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:49,986
- What is this?
- Plane tickets and hotel reservations

309
00:17:50,153 --> 00:17:51,988
for a weekend away in San Francisco.

310
00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:54,157
- Wow!
- That's so great!

311
00:17:54,324 --> 00:17:58,161
Yeah, there's fisherman's wharf
and Alcatraz and cable cars.

312
00:17:58,328 --> 00:17:59,496
We're gonna have so much fun.

313
00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:06,336
- We?
- Is there a problem?

314
00:18:06,503 --> 00:18:08,797
Oh, no, no. I just, I said, "whee!"

315
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:13,802
How dare you go on the Internet
and say mean things about me,

316
00:18:13,969 --> 00:18:16,680
and compare my genitalia
to a part of czechoslovakia?

317
00:18:18,848 --> 00:18:20,600
You saw through that one, did ya?

318
00:18:21,059 --> 00:18:25,605
I don't know what you were thinking,
but take the video down now!

319
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:30,026
She watched it.
I'm gonna get that girl back.

320
00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:34,614
Amy: I only watched it because you
e-mailed it to me with the subject line

321
00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:36,116
"this is gonna make you mad!"

322
00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:41,538
She was listening through the door.
She wants me.

323
00:19:12,110 --> 00:19:13,111
English - sdh