1 00:00:03,629 --> 00:00:06,256 I was unstoppable. I mean, I was on fire. 2 00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:09,760 It was like my mind and my body were totally connected. 3 00:00:09,927 --> 00:00:13,931 Like athletes must feel when they're in the zone. 4 00:00:14,097 --> 00:00:17,184 Penny: Again, it was miniature golf. 5 00:00:18,060 --> 00:00:20,229 Admit it, you're a little turned on. 6 00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:22,022 You can't be this proud. 7 00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:25,776 - Why not? - Because I beat you. 8 00:00:27,736 --> 00:00:28,904 -Hey. 9 00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:30,614 Oh, good, you're back. 10 00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:34,368 We have some exciting news. 11 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:36,411 Okay. 12 00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:40,207 As you know, Amy and I have been together a long time... 13 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:44,044 And a lot of things I never thought possible... 14 00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:45,921 Now seem possible. 15 00:00:46,797 --> 00:00:48,757 Okay. 16 00:00:49,508 --> 00:00:52,177 After a careful evaluation of our relationship... 17 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:56,932 We decided that the time was right to take a step fonnard. 18 00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,523 Okay. 19 00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:07,734 Do you wanna say it? 20 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:10,028 Let's say it together. 21 00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:13,156 - We're getting a turtle. - We're getting a turtle. 22 00:01:16,243 --> 00:01:20,330 See, this is why I've been saying we should keep champagne on ice. 23 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,791 - Sarcasm? - Yes. 24 00:01:22,958 --> 00:01:26,253 That was tricky, because when it comes to alcohol, she means business. 25 00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:30,340 - Well, we're very happy for you. - Yes. 26 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:34,761 Thank you. Acquiring a joint pet is a big step for us. 27 00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:37,931 No, it's true. It means that we care so much about each other... 28 00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:40,851 There's enough left over for an 8-ounce reptile. 29 00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:43,395 Why a turtle? 30 00:01:43,562 --> 00:01:46,815 Well, after much deliberation, we've determined that a turtle... 31 00:01:46,982 --> 00:01:48,275 _istheidealpet 32 00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:51,570 they don't shed fur, they don't make noise... 33 00:01:51,737 --> 00:01:54,406 For Halloween, we can dress him as a cobblestone. 34 00:01:55,741 --> 00:01:59,119 And if he ever goes berserk, I know I can outrun him. 35 00:01:59,286 --> 00:02:02,581 Coincidentally, that's also why I chose you as a roommate. 36 00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:04,833 Well, congratulations. 37 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:08,462 Who would've thought you would be the first in our group to start a family? 38 00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:11,923 That's what I said. 39 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:39,993 So where's your roommate tonight? 40 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,121 Well, I thought it was a little unfair that she's always here... 41 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:45,499 And you never get a chance to stay over... 42 00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:47,668 So I killed her. 43 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:50,837 Remember our agreement. 44 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:56,218 You can joke about murdering people, but you have to say "just kidding." 45 00:02:56,385 --> 00:03:00,555 And the more important thing to remember is that I'd never hurt you. 46 00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:08,271 Oh, crap. 47 00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:11,316 I have to run over to the hospital and check on a patient. 48 00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:15,028 - That's okay. I can come back later. - No, no, don't be silly. 49 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,905 I won't be gone long. Just stay here. 50 00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:21,243 Okay, cool. You're sure your roommate's not gonna come back while I'm here alone? 51 00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:22,994 Because that would be awkward. 52 00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:25,539 - Don't worry, she's in palm Springs. - Oh, good. 53 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,874 Well, her torso is. 54 00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:30,627 Just kidding. 55 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:33,839 I put her in a wood chipper. 56 00:03:37,342 --> 00:03:39,720 Oh, dear lord. Oh, dear lord. 57 00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:41,555 It's okay. 58 00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:45,517 - You made it, we're fine. - That was a lot of puppies. 59 00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:51,398 Let's forget about them and pick ourselves out a nice turtle. 60 00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:53,734 Oh, how about this one up on the log? 61 00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,569 Oh, I don't know. 62 00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:57,404 He looks like a jerk. 63 00:04:00,532 --> 00:04:01,908 How about this one? 64 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,411 He's barely moving. He looks half dead. 65 00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:06,955 I know. I like him too. 66 00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:10,917 Hi, little guy. 67 00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:13,920 How'd you like to come home with us? 68 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:17,716 You'll be living with me, because we don't live in the same house. 69 00:04:17,883 --> 00:04:19,134 But that's not your fault. 70 00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:22,512 Like you, we're taking it ridiculously slow. 71 00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:28,810 You'll stay with me when he's at comic-con, or away for work. 72 00:04:28,977 --> 00:04:33,440 Yeah, or if they accept daddy's application to live on Mars. 73 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,443 What are you talking about? 74 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:40,238 Well, there's this company that's attempting to establish a colony on Mars... 75 00:04:40,405 --> 00:04:42,491 And I applied to be among the first to go. 76 00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:44,242 What should we name him? 77 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:48,288 You know, I came in thinking "Seth"... 78 00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:51,458 But he kind of looks Italian. 79 00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:55,754 You applied for a mission to be a colonist on another planet... 80 00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:57,964 And couldn't be bothered to tell me? 81 00:05:00,050 --> 00:05:01,593 Would you have approved? 82 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,011 Of course not. 83 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:07,015 Well, based on your reaction, it looks like I made the right choice. 84 00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,101 Isn't that right, giuseppe? 85 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:16,441 Hey. Hey. 86 00:05:16,608 --> 00:05:19,319 Listen, I have a little confession to make. 87 00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:22,113 Aw. Is this your first time? 88 00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:29,037 No, I got you something for Valentine's day, and I was too embarrassed to give it to you. 89 00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:30,539 Well, why? 90 00:05:30,705 --> 00:05:34,626 Because I got it at the dirty store. 91 00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:38,296 You went to the dirty store without me? 92 00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:42,425 In sunglasses and a hat after I parked two blocks away. 93 00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:44,719 - Well, get it. Get it for me. - Yeah? 94 00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:47,347 - Yeah. - Okay. Uh, well, I hope it's fun. 95 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:51,810 It comes with paints and it's kind of creative and artistic. 96 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:55,188 Okay, did you go to the dirty store, or Michaels? 97 00:05:57,774 --> 00:06:00,026 No, no, we cover ourselves in body paint... 98 00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:03,738 And then we get on this big canvas and do our thing. 99 00:06:04,573 --> 00:06:09,411 Whoa. It's kind of a big step for a guy who only recently agreed to take his socks off. 100 00:06:10,287 --> 00:06:13,081 - You're making fun of me. Forget it. - No. No, I wanna do it. 101 00:06:14,583 --> 00:06:18,295 Let's you, me and your very, very pale feet make some art. 102 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:22,173 When you go back to the store, I wanna go with you. 103 00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:26,011 Okay. But it's a drive. The one I went to is in San Diego. 104 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:31,308 - How are the taxes going? - Okay. 105 00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:34,644 But you got a lot of receipts for the lego store in here. 106 00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:39,608 Those are business expenses. You can write those off. 107 00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:44,738 A $200 r2-d2 is a business expense? 108 00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:49,784 Oh, Bernie, you're gonna have to sound a lot more confident when we get audited. 109 00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:56,499 Hey. What's up? 110 00:06:56,917 --> 00:07:00,712 Oh, Emily ran back to the hospital, so I'm just hanging out at her place. 111 00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:04,215 - What are you, uh...? What are you doing? - Just playing video games... 112 00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:06,051 While Bernie does the taxes. 113 00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:08,470 What are you, a little kid? 114 00:07:08,637 --> 00:07:11,556 Is she gonna cut your dinner into little pieces too? 115 00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:16,061 She doesn't have to, I filled up on jelly beans. 116 00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:19,564 So, uh, what game are you...? 117 00:07:19,731 --> 00:07:22,108 Oh, crap. 118 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:25,779 - What's wrong? - I can't get Emily's nightstand to close. 119 00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:28,657 - 80? - She's gonna know I was looking in it. 120 00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:30,825 Why were you looking in it? 121 00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:34,913 Well, there's a question I better have a good answer to before she gets back. 122 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:38,249 Okay, calm down. There's probably something jammed behind it. 123 00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,669 - Just pull it out and see what's there. - Hang on. 124 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:47,425 Oh, no. Oh, no. 125 00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:49,636 Oh, god, no. 126 00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:53,765 You know what? You sound busy. I'm gonna let you go. 127 00:07:54,182 --> 00:07:57,394 Dude, the whole front came off. Now, she's gonna know I was snooping. 128 00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:58,687 What's happening? 129 00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:01,731 Raj was snooping through Emily's drawers and broke one. 130 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,652 Aw. I'm gonna miss her. 131 00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,364 So, what do you think? 132 00:08:10,991 --> 00:08:13,827 I thought it'd be a little more... 133 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:15,954 Just more. 134 00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:21,710 I'm not even sure why we were out of breath. 135 00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:26,339 I mean, did we move at all? 136 00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:28,675 Maybe along the z axis... 137 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:32,178 But x and y are looking pretty sad. 138 00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:36,725 Come on, we are not old, boring people. We could do better than this. 139 00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:39,269 That's true. How late did we stay up last night? 140 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:41,980 Almost I am. 141 00:08:42,731 --> 00:08:45,108 Damn straight, almost I am. 142 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:51,656 And we weren't even watching TV, we were watching Netflix like the kids do. 143 00:08:52,157 --> 00:08:55,827 Yeah. Is it a comedy? Is it a drama? Nobody knows. 144 00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,621 Come on. We are gonna do this. 145 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:03,251 You get the paint, I'll rest for 30 to 40 minutes, and then we do this. 146 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:10,258 I can't believe you almost had me bring a wild animal into my home. 147 00:09:10,425 --> 00:09:12,802 No one told you to poke the turtle's face. 148 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:16,639 I was playing got your nose. 149 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,518 That's how you get children to like you. 150 00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:23,563 I'm surprised you care if he likes you... 151 00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:26,649 Since you're leaving the planet the first chance you get. 152 00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:30,737 This again. Amy, I've already had one new hole torn in my body today... 153 00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:33,490 I don't need another one. 154 00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:38,411 Sheldon, I know the odds of you even going to Mars are incredibly small... 155 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:41,247 But it hurts that you would volunteer for something... 156 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,458 That would take you away from me forever. 157 00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:45,877 You wouldn't leave me... 158 00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:49,547 For the chance to be one of the first humans to colonize another planet? 159 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:53,384 I would at least mention it before filling out the application. 160 00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:57,931 Huh. That's exactly what Leonard, Wolowitz, Koothrappali, Bernadette and penny said. 161 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:03,103 And who says you could even survive an interplanetary mission anyway? 162 00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:05,438 You could barely survive a tiny turtle bite. 163 00:10:06,064 --> 00:10:07,607 First of all, this... 164 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,401 Has only made me stronger. 165 00:10:10,568 --> 00:10:13,738 But beyond that, all I did was fill out an application. 166 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:18,034 You know what? Go to Mars, Sheldon. 167 00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:23,248 Is there anything I can do to cheer you up? 168 00:10:23,498 --> 00:10:24,624 No, forget it. 169 00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:29,129 - What if I play the Star Trek theme on my nose? - Please don't. 170 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:38,888 Yep, you're mad. 171 00:10:44,561 --> 00:10:47,230 - Okay, let me see the damage. - Raj: Hang on. 172 00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:50,608 I think you broke the dowels. 173 00:10:50,775 --> 00:10:53,319 You won't have time to glue it. You'll have to nail it. 174 00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:57,115 - With what? - Does she have any pillows or wine glasses? 175 00:10:57,949 --> 00:10:59,325 - She does. - Great. 176 00:10:59,534 --> 00:11:02,036 Neither of those. Try a hammer! 177 00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:08,168 Did that feel good? You feel like a big man now? 178 00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:14,841 I was going to make you red zinger... 179 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:20,054 But since Mars is the red planet, I went with peppermint. 180 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,392 Why do you even wanna do this? 181 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,562 Actually... 182 00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:32,358 As part of the application, I was required to make a short video... 183 00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,569 Answering that very question. 184 00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,572 - You wanna see it? - Can't you just tell me? 185 00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:40,158 But I made a video. 186 00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,128 Sheldon: I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper... 187 00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:48,291 And I'd like to tell you why I should be chosen to... 188 00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:51,502 Go to Mars! 189 00:11:52,962 --> 00:11:56,216 I'm exceedingly smart. I graduated college at 14. 190 00:11:56,382 --> 00:12:00,428 While my brother was getting an std, I was getting a phd. 191 00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:05,558 Penicillin can't take this away. 192 00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:10,146 Being in close quarters, cleanliness is important. 193 00:12:10,313 --> 00:12:13,316 And my hygiene is impeccable. 194 00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:15,526 In fact, animals don't trust me... 195 00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:18,279 Because I smell like nothing. 196 00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,407 Literally nothing. 197 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:27,372 During the seven-month space flight, I can keep up morale... 198 00:12:27,538 --> 00:12:29,916 With my wacky sense of humor. 199 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:33,419 Hey, Leonard... 200 00:12:33,628 --> 00:12:36,589 Is there any peanut brittle left in that can? 201 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,592 You mean this weirdly suspicious one? 202 00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:42,720 Yes. Open it and check. 203 00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,603 I don't get it. There's actually peanut brittle... 204 00:12:57,694 --> 00:12:59,904 Please go to Mars. 205 00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:03,074 But on a more serious note... 206 00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:05,702 The most important reason I wanna go to Mars... 207 00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:08,371 Is that I believe, as a scientist... 208 00:13:08,538 --> 00:13:13,126 It's my duty to push the boundaries of human knowledge fon/vard. 209 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:16,296 Now, [know that life on Mars will be difficult. 210 00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:19,257 But life here on earth is no picnic. 211 00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:21,092 Also, picnics are no picnic. 212 00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:26,180 "Where should we go for lunch? Oh, I know, the ground." 213 00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:30,268 In conclusion, thank you for considering me... 214 00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:33,146 For this journey of a lifetime. 215 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:37,483 To Mars. 216 00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:43,698 Aftennards, Leonard blew his nose and pie came out. 217 00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,120 Leonard: Right there. 218 00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:51,247 Right there. Oh, god, that's it. 219 00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:59,505 - How did you get paint in your eye? - You wouldn't let me wear safety goggles. 220 00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:07,013 This looks terrible. She... she's gonna know. 221 00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,640 It's fine. You just need two more nails. 222 00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:13,061 - Okay, where should I put them? - In Emily's eyes. 223 00:14:14,729 --> 00:14:16,147 You're not helping. 224 00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,816 Well, maybe this is what you get for snooping. 225 00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:21,103 - It's bad enough that I have to deal... - Emily: Raj? 226 00:14:21,194 --> 00:14:24,155 - I'm back. - Oh, no. 227 00:14:25,156 --> 00:14:26,532 -Hey. 228 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,827 How...? How's the hospital? 229 00:14:30,328 --> 00:14:32,872 Fine. What were you doing in there? 230 00:14:34,457 --> 00:14:36,542 Uh, we... well... 231 00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:41,798 Look, I don't wanna lie to you. I got curious, I was looking around... 232 00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:44,217 And I broke the drawer on your nightstand. 233 00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:47,470 - You were looking in my nightstand? - Yeah. 234 00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:51,182 So the first time I leave you alone, you snoop on me? 235 00:14:52,225 --> 00:14:54,852 - You've never snooped around my apartment? - No. 236 00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:59,273 Come on, think back. It would really help if you had. 237 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:03,861 - Emily: I can't believe you don't trust me. - She sounds really mad. 238 00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:09,033 - We should hang up. - Yeah, we should. 239 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:12,078 - But we're not going to, are we? - Not a chance. 240 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,748 What happened to "snooping is wrong"? 241 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:19,210 Oh, we're already going to jail for tax fraud. Who cares? 242 00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:24,048 Well, we did it. 243 00:15:26,050 --> 00:15:27,718 I mean, I was on fire. 244 00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:30,096 I was in the zone like an athlete. 245 00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:32,640 Sweetie, I beat you at this too. 246 00:15:33,850 --> 00:15:35,226 So where do we wanna hang it? 247 00:15:35,393 --> 00:15:37,562 What, are you kidding? We're not hanging it. 248 00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:39,605 But it's an expression of our love. 249 00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,066 And our butts. Not hanging it. 250 00:15:43,568 --> 00:15:45,570 Seems a shame to throw it away. 251 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:52,452 Oh. We can give it to Sheldon and tell him William shatner painted it. 252 00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:57,415 God, I love you. I love you so much. 253 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:02,420 I think I'm gonna go home. 254 00:16:03,546 --> 00:16:05,214 Why? 255 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,468 I really don't understand what's happening here. 256 00:16:08,634 --> 00:16:11,429 You know, Sheldon, at any other time... 257 00:16:11,596 --> 00:16:15,266 Learning that you had plans to go live on Mars would be a slow news day. 258 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:19,562 But a couple of hours ago, we were getting a turtle. 259 00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:22,148 And silly as it sounds... 260 00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:24,942 I thought that meant something. 261 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,656 Why didn't I give her sleepytime tea? 262 00:16:33,451 --> 00:16:34,660 Amy, wait. 263 00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,747 Getting a turtle meant a great deal to me too. 264 00:16:37,914 --> 00:16:40,583 Sure. Unless something better comes along. 265 00:16:41,959 --> 00:16:44,253 Do you want me to withdraw my application? 266 00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:50,009 What I want is for us to be planning our future together. 267 00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:54,514 And in that future... 268 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,390 Are we on the same planet? 269 00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:00,770 Because I've seen people make the long-distance thing work. 270 00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:02,522 - We're on the same planet! - Okay. 271 00:17:06,609 --> 00:17:08,611 Does that planet have to be earth? 272 00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:12,240 Are you asking me to go to Mars with you? 273 00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:17,995 Yeah, if I'm going to a barren, lifeless environment... 274 00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:22,375 Where the chances of survival are slim to none... 275 00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:24,043 I want you there with me. 276 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:33,010 Why don't we go back to the apartment and fill out your application? 277 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,263 Okay. 278 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:39,225 I suppose being the first people on a new planet... 279 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:40,893 Would be incredibly exciting. 280 00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:42,853 I know. 281 00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:46,399 We could be the first to plant a flag on Mars. 282 00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:50,027 We could be the first to watch Mars attacks! On Mars. 283 00:17:50,945 --> 00:17:52,280 We could be the first to say: 284 00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:55,491 "Good lord. What on Mars are you talking about?" 285 00:17:56,909 --> 00:18:02,248 You know, we could also be the first people to procreate on Mars. 286 00:18:04,041 --> 00:18:07,086 You just can't keep it in your space pants, can you? 287 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:13,551 Think about it. If we had a family there, our kids would be martians. 288 00:18:15,595 --> 00:18:18,389 They would, wouldn't they? 289 00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:21,559 We could give them cool martian names... 290 00:18:21,726 --> 00:18:23,978 And we could teach them about martian history. 291 00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:25,855 Like, "who planted those flags?" 292 00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:29,900 And, uh, "where'd that copy of Mars attacks! Come from?" 293 00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:33,487 I guess we'll have to make a new video together as a couple. 294 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,907 Good idea. Yeah... 295 00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:39,744 And since you've had such a rough day... 296 00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:42,330 I'm gonna let you throw the pie in Leonard's face. 297 00:18:49,420 --> 00:18:52,214 - Thank you for forgiving me. - It's okay. 298 00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:54,884 At some point, we were bound to have our first fight. 299 00:18:55,384 --> 00:18:59,847 Well, it almost happened when you called my apple-pie crust doughy. 300 00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:05,645 The truth is you were right, and I was just angry at myself. 301 00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:08,814 Can I ask you one thing? 302 00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:10,191 Of course. What? 303 00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,818 Did you look in my closet? 304 00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,864 - No, just the drawer. - You promise you didn't look in the closet? 305 00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:19,325 I promise. Why, what's in there? 306 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,410 Don't worry about it. 307 00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:23,537 Good night.